You remember the claims made by the Stepford Wives.

To recap:
‘Your life becomes so amazing when you have a child.’
‘You’ll fall in love with your child as soon as you see him.’
‘Your bond with your husband becomes so much stronger.’

You add Borg to the list of insults … You have a baby and you become a mother. Just that. A Mother. It’s like your slate is wiped clean and any identity you had prior to this event is immaterial. You are suddenly morphed into the collective. Unique no longer features on your DNA. As for the Stepford Wives, none of those feelings kicked in. My life did not become amazing. I was up to my elbows in sour vomit, crappy nappies and washing. I did not fall in love with my child. Quite the contrary, I felt like throwing him against the wall. My bond with my husband didn’t become stronger. In fact, I often wanted to throw him against the wall too.