I grew up in a household where privacy was incredibly important, as long as it wasn’t my own. I wasn’t allowed in my parents room when they were dressing and to this day I feel intense embarrassment if I happen to walk in on either of my parents in any kind of state of undress. I was, however, never allowed to barricade my own door without threats to withhold stuff I wanted unless I let my parents into my own private space. I felt violated.

My child is only four now but I find myself hitting up against hurdles at various stages of his development … as well as my own personal development. There was a stage around his second birthday that I decided he could no longer bath with me. I realised, relatively quickly, this angst for what it was and we were back having family bath times soon afterwards. Walking around naked; skinny dipping in summer; morning snuggles, even if my husband and I don’t have our pyjamas on … all things that are really perfectly normal.

There are boundaries, of course, as there are in almost everything to do with ‘bringing up baby’, but I am slowly learning to allow my child to take the lead. Instead of closing the door on him to get my privacy, I have taught him how to close his own door when he needs private time. That way, he will hopefully respect the times he is required to knock before entering our bedroom on those occasions when boundaries cannot be crossed and when he’s a teenager he will know that closing his bedroom door is a passport to a little sanctuary of his own.